Babies R Us

I have a handful of close female friends, several of whom I have known for 15 years or more, all of whom I know will be a part of my life for the next 15 years to come. Through these friendships, I have been able to become friends with their spouses, and have good relationships with all of them, albeit on different levels, with each couple. So as the old rhyme goes, first comes love, then comes marriage....and now, ironically, four of the flock are pregnant. What is even more ironic is that all four of them are due within about six weeks of each other. Now, two of these ladies were good friends with eachother before I even met them (back in high school! Yikes!) and planned to try and get pregnant at the same time, and luckily for them it happen to work out that way. But the other two are just random occurrences in my small world.

It goes without saying that I am incredibly excited for all of them. They will be wonderful parents. So why is anything besides a wonderful occurrence in my life (other than knowing I have some serious upcoming baby gift expenses)? When I came out, had one gay friend. My true friends, the ones I could turn to at any hour, the ones I could see every day and never get tired of, were the same people I had always been friends with from high school, college, grad school and other aspects of my life, including these mothers-to-be. And they are all straight. At the time, they all were, or have since become, married. We all still hung out. Got ridiculously drunk. A lot. Put us all in a room with a good bottle of wine (make that six good bottles of wine) and we could go all night. I guess a small part of me thought that it would be like that forever. I realize that people grow and change and move forward. I realized that this group of people, including myself, would do the same thing. I guess I never thought that it might all happen at once.

I know that this makes me sound incredibly selfish. The problem is that ultimately, what my friends have, or are in the process in having, is what I always have wanted, and in all likelihood, will never have. I know, as a gay man, I can supposedly have it all. But I probably won't, and I am fine with that notion. I guess a small part of me was hoping in the back of my subconscious that these folks could have taken turns...you know...one couple and one baby a year....every six months would have worked too. A kind of selfish easing of everyone in to this new phase in life. In reality though, I guess I just need to open a line of credit at Babies R Us and be done with it.