The WTF Garage Sale

So my parents, who are about half a block from walking right in to the funny farm, decided to participate in their neighborhood garage sale this past weekend. Being the dutiful homo son I am, I dragged my brother (actually he dragged me since I need a ride out to the 'burbs) and we helped hock the crap that has been gathering dust in my parents basement for years. When I first heard about the upcoming jem and junk extravaganza, my only reaction was WTF? My parents are in their "later" sixties...they really have no business having some crazy garage sale. However, after perusing the items before they received their 50 cent price tags, I said, bring it on. The only way I could look at it is that they are saving me the step of having to throw all of this "stuff" (and I use that word loosely) out later down the road.

Of course, it rained on Saturday. My parents on had two sad, half-blown up balloons in front of their house, and despite my brother's and my best efforts to entice people up the driveway with our charm, wit and good looks, the final tally at the end of the afternoon was only about $250. Utterly pathetic. Many thanks to my co-worker, "Mama Jaxon" who totally showed up randomly to throw her support our way, going as far as even crossing the bridge over from VA to MD. Thank god for GPS, right Mama? :-)

To drown my sorrows from the lack-luster community pawn off, I polished off about 20 (+/- 5)drinks Saturday night. Yikes. Give me two drinks, and I start spilling the beans. And everyone knows loose lips sink ships. So, now that I have made my previously anonymous blog a bit more public (not that I tecnically having anything to hide other than looking like a ho), I have to say hello to my friend ______. I am leaving the name blank, as he has not yet decided how he would like to be referred to in blog postings. So once he has safely decided on a trick name, I will begin referring to him as such moving forward.